Dinwiddie Dinos
Andrew Sharpe · Dinwiddie, VA
Three seasons of prehistoric chaos, one disgraceful exit, and a championship that technically happened. The Dinos finished last in 2022, refused to serve their Saccko punishment, and were dragged into 2023 under a cloud of dishonor. They proceeded to — accidentally, it seemed — win the whole league. The title was subsequently vacated. Then they went extinct. A fitting end.
All-Time Record
35W – 28L
Championships
1
Vacated
Playoff Appearances
1
Saccko Finishes
1
Refused to serve
Avg Finish
5.3
Season History
Top Players All-Time
Juan Soto
UTIL
Marcus Semien
2B
Corbin Carroll
UTIL
Max Fried
SP
Gunnar Henderson
3B
Christian Walker
1B
Head-to-Head Records
Results across all three seasons (2022–2024), versus teams by their names at the time.
| Opponent | W | L | T | Record |
|---|---|---|---|---|
| Ghent Whistlepigs | 7 | 0 | 0 | Leads |
| West Virginia Pepperoni Rolls | 8 | 3 | 0 | Leads |
| Syracuse SaltyDogs | 5 | 2 | 0 | Leads |
| Delmarva Shureburds | 4 | 2 | 0 | Leads |
| Sugar Land Space Cowboys | 4 | 3 | 0 | Leads |
| Manhattan Mega Rats | 4 | 4 | 0 | Even |
| Mississippi Mudcats | 4 | 5 | 0 | Trails |
| Ft. Meade Folksy Ferrets | 3 | 5 | 0 | Trails |
| Portland Chinook | 2 | 4 | 0 | Trails |
Circumstances of Removal
2022 Saccko Bracket: The Dinwiddie Dinos finished 9th in the inaugural CBA season, landing them squarely in the Saccko bracket — the league’s punishment bracket for the worst-performing teams. Andrew Sharpe declined to participate. The punishment went unserved. The league took note.
2023 “Championship”: In an outcome that still baffles historians, the Dinos rebounded from their Saccko-bracket disgrace to go 14-7 and win the 2023 Continental Breakfast Alliance title. The league, already simmering over the unserved punishment, found this insufferable. The championship was subsequently vacated. The trophy remains unclaimed.
Exit from the League: Following the 2024 season, Andrew Sharpe was removed from the league. The Dinwiddie Dinos played their final game and were replaced by the Bristol Banshees ahead of 2025. The Banshees, in their first act as a franchise, accepted the Saccko rules without complaint and then won the championship. Point made.
Legacy
“He won the league and got kicked out for it. That’s a sentence that has never been written before.”
The Dinwiddie Dinos played three seasons in the Continental Breakfast Alliance under Andrew Sharpe. They refused a punishment, accidentally won the title, had it vacated, and were replaced by a franchise that immediately won the championship the right way. Their slot was inherited by the Bristol Banshees, who also inherited — in a cruel twist of prehistory — Juan Soto.